i am . . .

It’s a quiet night on the home front. Bike is put away; swim gear is drying. It’s supposed to rain tomorrow — had to get in as much today as I could . . . in honor of my birthday.

I’m calmer this year facing my birthday than I’ve been in years past. I don’t have any plans, and I don’t mind. It’s just . . . The days drag and the years fly on. Where does time go?

I must be the oldest almost 34-year-old on the planet.

I’m learning to accept myself this year. Calling myself beautiful instead of calling myself names. It’s not easy to change the way you see yourself, but it’s worth it. It sets the course for the rest of your life — and, in some cases, for others.

I saw this video recently and really liked it. Please, let me know what you think. :)

The most powerful force in the human psyche is how we describe ourselves to ourselves. Who’s giving you labels?

34 is going to be my best year yet.

16 thoughts

  1. Happy Birthday, Jess. Wishing you a wonderful year ahead. You are entitled to be yourself, be who you are, do what you want to do and go after what you want. All the best for what you want big or small. Accepting yourself is harder than we think. Often we are our worst critics especially if we are the determined kind. For a long time I struggled with trying to better myself and felt that I had to. After a long time I realised that a lot of the time reaching achievements, win or lose, don’t define us. It’s the choices that we make that usually does.

    • I agree with that! It’s how we navigate this crazy thing called life that matters most. I just really liked this guy’s message. His story is pretty powerful. I hope you had a great February 28!

  2. Happy Birthday Ms Jessica!

    What a beautiful person! Inside and out! Your writing is beautiful and says something about you. You rock triathalons so you must be beautifully fit and determined. I envy you! Enjoy your day Jess. And your b day week!

    • Thanks so much! So glad to have met you through this blogosphere. I hope you have a wonderful day, too!

      p.s. It’s raining here today, but I plan to go for a long run and swim later regardless. If you don’t use it, you lose it!

      • That is so true! Especially as you get older. :-) so glad to have met you here too Jessica. I think you are a refreshing inspiration… Happy Birthday Week! Eat lots of cake….ride it off. ;-)

  3. The video produces so many thoughts for me. I have struggled with “happiness” for years. A few friends keep telling me that only I am responsible for my own happiness, I can’t blame others for it. I can’t put the responsibility for my happiness on others. And I agree with that, it’s still a struggle. The video gets to that same point about a person’s entire self-image. The only person whose opinion about you that matters is you. Yeah, sure, if you have a job where you work for somebody else, you do have to care about your boss, and your co-workers, and you need to care about your family, and others that are close to you. But they don’t get to define your success. You do. I wish more people would recognize that.

    • Really glad you liked the video. His mentor’s comment that he’d received “shitty programming” is something I’ve heard in counseling before. Some people are more likely to allow outside influences to impact how they see themselves than others (I’ve always been a “pleaser” and want everyone to like me), but I think Rock Thomas is right: At the end of the day, we need to take back the reins and realize that it doesn’t MATTER what others think. What matters is how we see and treat ourselves. It’s complicated because it’s not just a matter of believing in ourselves. It’s knowing what we are capable of and taking responsibility for getting ourselves where we want to go. I like that word “empowered.” I think too many of us (myself included) sometimes feel trapped and victimized by our circumstances, when really, it’s up to us to change that narrative.

  4. Another lap of the sun down, another wonder-filled lap begins. I tell my daughter, “Be nice to yourself. There’s no shortage of people in the world who are more than willing to be mean to you. You shouldn’t be one of them.”
    Happy Birthday, Jessica.

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